My First Mother's Day

No little hugs or kisses
to wake me up on this morn.
No special card or roses sent my way.
Bittersweet feelings, at least a thousand tears;
Quietly, I celebrated you this day.

I am not like the others,
Though I still wear the name.
I cannot hold you in my arms,
But I love you just the same.

I knelt beside your resting place,
Though I knew you were not there.
I prayed to God in Heaven:
A peace I found in knowing,
sweet child, you're in His care.

To see a mother with her baby-
How my heart breaks in two;
But never would I trade this pain
If it meant there had been no you.

At times I feel I cannot go on-
Living this life without you.
Yet hidden behind my deepest grief
There is joy unexplainibly true.

For my child, you will always be a blessing from above.
Your brief existence has bestowed on me a name I cherish dear.
And although this day is not what I imagined it to be,
I will treasure it because of you-
MY FIRST MOTHER'S DAY.

I love this poem! It really puts into words a lot of my feelings. Under the circumstances I think this Mother's Day went well. We spent some time with Lexi and had dinner with my family. Zach was so wonderful and made me breakfast and got me flowers and a gift. I love him soooo very much...he is the BEST! He makes me laugh and holds me when I cry...which is a lot lately.

Thank you Alexis...because of you I am a mother and was able to celebrate that today. I miss you so very much.